Stab Me With Your Flowers

Keep Your Friends Close and Your Enemies Sedated

Beware, Beware, the Ides of March!

Fear not the patricians with daggers beneath their cloaks, nay, fear the beast of impropriety and wanton lust that threatens to burst forth from thy chest, clawing it's way into the sunlight after it's winter retreat!

Et Tu, Bootay?

I'm Captain Heartlock, and here's what to do with yourself until the weekend gets here.

Wednesday March 10th!

Psychedelia runs wild again this week with yet another themed gathering of the minds: it's the BLACK MAJIK party over at Glasslands Gallery on Kent Ave in the 'burg. It's a $7 cover and there's FREE BEER from 9-10. Hey, you like cool music and you like being a drunk so it's a win win for you. Featuring such illustrious acts as the lysergically gifted, dreamy psych-pop band HIMALAYA, SANTINO SANTINO, (which from their sole yet promising MySpace offering sounds like Beatles influenced baroque pop) , THE SHINING TWINS (two girls singing twee and playing primitive guitar with a real caveman of a drummer) and the fuzzed out, reverb drenched punk stylings of BABY FANGS. All local bands that are on the move and worth checking out now!

Smell the glove! Smell it!!!! Heavy stupidity and fun times are to be had Wednesday night at Otto's Shrunken Head over on 14th and Ave. B in the city for the awesome twice monthly homage party COPYCAT, as the acid-metal power trio LA OTRACINA and the punk dirtbags THE RATS pay tribute to SPINAL TAP! Somebody is going to HAVE to play in D minor, the saddest of all keys, for sure. Proprietor of this fine shindig Dj Xerox is joined on the decks tonight by special guest DJ Allan Dias of PIL! This one goes to 11, motherfuckers. FREE as always, and be sure to ask for the drink special for this night "The Sour Pussy". MEOW. Purrrr. HISS!

Back to Brooklyn for a stellar DJ night with The Hidden Ratio's MATT ROBSON hosting a Kraut Rock Party over at The Cove on N. 6th btw. Berry and Whythe in Williamsburg. No cover, Klaus Kinski, Neu!, Amon Düül and lazer lights abound for the Kraut Demon in YOU.

And of course, the one two punch of coolness in the Lower East Side, MR. FINE WINE and his soul/r&b 45's over at Botanica and JONATHAN TOUBIN and The New York Night Train over at Motor City, rule the school. Both free and deadly fun!

Thursday March 11th

Wanna dance? Wanna mingle with the neighborhood cats? Wanna spend your rent/drug money on excellent records? Do yourself a favor and get over to one of my favorite places to buy wax, The Record Grouch, and hit up THE RECORD GROUCH GRAND OPENING SUPER SHAKEDOWN DANCE PAWTY! JONATHAN TOUBIN, IVAN SUNSHINE and the grouch himself, MR. FUNNYBID'NESS will be providing the tunes for you from 7pm till about 10. Which gives you JUST enough time to hike it over to ENIDS in Greenpoint BK for The Thursday Thump: This week's party is quite the treat: FINE STYLE, in which main selector ALEX MOYER, PHAST PHREDDIE and East Village Radio's INSPEKTOR STRAWBERRY SODAPOP educate all dem childrun inna vintage reggae scorchers, all on '45 black gold platters. Jah will provide. It's up to you to boogie.

Friends, Countrymen, Lend me your ears and I'll sing you the night fantastic! Get out there and enjoy your lives.

Till next time...

add to del.icio.us to Digg Share on Facebook

Week, Parts 1-3

Sorry, that part of the week is over.
It's Sunday, Monday or Tuesday.
You have to pretend to be be normal now.

Sunday

Start the evening with Awesome Color at the Market Hotel BUT BE WARNED... they're playing one of those shows "with their friends" which means that nobody else on the bill sounds anything like them. Check out the openers' MySpace pages first (Tyvek, Talk Normal, CSC Funk Band) and see if you like 'em before you decide when to start your evening (personally I kind of like CSC's stripped-down funk-jazz sound, but could do without the other two). Cover unknown. Seriously, nobody has the slightest clue how much it'll cost, it's not on anyone's MySpace, or on Todd P's site, or anywhere at all.

So anyway, our good pals Dave The Spazz and Andy Maltz will be spinning some good music over at Union Pool starting at 10pm. While they might play just about anything (at least anything you can dance to) they seem to prefer the music of the 50s and 60s, soul, and old-fashioned garage.

Monday

Two shows for ya' tonight. Humboldt Fog engulfs K&M in Brooklyn in fuzzed out rock-n-roll. That show is free and starts at 8pm, and ends "by" 10pm, which means that you can also catch the later show featuring The Reverend Vince Anderson. He and his Love Choir bring the sounds of Gospel, Blues and Soul to the holiest place in Brooklyn, Union Pool (much like God, it is everywhere this week). Starts at 11pm and also free.

Tuesday

Sick of all these choices? Well have we got the day for you! It's called Tuesday and is best known around these parts for Hot Dog!, a night of DJs spinning Rock-n-Roll, 50's and 60's R'n'B, Soul, Funk, Garage Rock, Punk, and more at Bar Matchless. They've also got 2-for-1 drinks, which'll get you spinning by the end of the night. Starts at 9:44:23pm or some damn thing like that 10pm and there is no cover.

Marcus

add to del.icio.us to Digg Share on Facebook

What Can You Say?

What can we say? It's a slow weekend here in New Yak. There's only a few thingies to do, so read closely. That said, at least it's a bit nicer outside (yeah we just jinxed it).

TONIGHT (FRIDAY):

We mighta missed something (we often do like SMDD last week-- sorry!), but there's NO live shows tonight of note. What? OK here's some dj action instead:

Killin' it uptown will be DJ Linda and her garage rock'n'roll party called "Faster Pussycat Spin Spin" at the infamous Ding Dong Lounge. It's the last outpost of rock'n'roll up there on Columbus, after that you might as well kick into high gear and head all the way up to Kingston. FREE

Over at Motor City, DJ Matt the Knife has got punk and rockabilly on his mind. He'd like to share it with you. Also free.

Jonathan Toubin is having a characteristially busy evening-- he starts off opening the SITE Festival launch party at Bushwick's Beauty Bar around 9. SITE is some sort of Bushwick arts thing. It's got events all weekend long but naturally the launch party will be the funnest part. Did I mention that I'm DJing, along with fellow GPNYCer Capt. Heartlock and friend-of-the-show Cowboy Mark? You've pretty much got your 50's/60's genres covered with this group of 4. And it's FREE (running theme tonight!)

But back to Toubin. He'll jump on the JMZ around 10 and head over to Home Sweet Home, where he'll meet up with his guest DJ Small Change for another edition of Shakin' All Over Sideways Down. Despite the title of this night, it's more of a soul night than a garage thing... Small Change has long been a fixture at WFMU and infamously caused EastVillageRadio to drop their podcasts when he illicitly played some prelease remix of some famous douche who cares about that sort of thing. He's more of a genre mixer than you'd find at most events listed here, but who knows? Maybe he can pull off the 60's thing. small cover $?

CANCELLED Over at Beauty Bar Manhattan, Josh Styles should be holding down his usual first Friday night with Smashed!Blocked! Free

AND, back in Greenpoint, the Rebels will be at their ABC Night at Warsaw, telephone loudspeakers included for another rockabilly/r'n'b throwdown.

SATURDAY:

Start off the day right-- with alcohol. Yes, you can wake up around 11 and drag yerself over to Kill Devil Hill, Cowboy Mark's store on Franklin St in Greenpoint for an all day party. It's the launch of a clothing-makeup-hair product line (sorry, I read it all too quickly) for rockabilly types launched by Laura Rebel Angel (a Rocka-Psycho-billy promoter, performer & enthusiast). There'll be boss rockabilly DJs and some sort of supergroup of NYC rockabilly characters (around 8PM). Free entry.

Later on there's ONE live show: the Bamboo Kids and the Dirty Shames hit Lit Lounge in the big ol' city. Those Shames sure are busy! The venue is a weird one-- a basement with this sort of carved-out-cave vibe to it and a serious "pro sound crew" who groove to... punk/metal/rap (as in the genre which mixes all three). Also expect the party to come to a crashing halt around 12:30 or so, when the resident DJs kick the cool kids out. You'll know the DJs by their shiny bald heads, pumping muscles and Mac laptops set to shuffle ("Wow! a Blondie song right after a Strokes song-- genius!"). Sorry, but we've been there... this is reality folks. BUT! the vitriol aside, it's good bands with heart so give it a shot. $?

Back to the DJs. Jumpy & Girlsoul return to Huckleberry with Soul-A-Go-Go, always a no-miss night on Grand St in Brooklyn. FREE

Further out in Brooklyn, there's Quitty's Mod-Life Crisis Loft Party. Yes, it will be as fun as it sounds! There's going to be mad soul & ska DJs, it's free & byob. Where? Let's say it's on Johnson Ave by the Jefferson L... you know who to ask to get directions, so do it, chicken head!

Oh and if you're stuck in the city, you could do worse than Unsteady Freddie's long running Surf Nite at Otto's.

See ya 'round town!

SHIMMY

add to del.icio.us to Digg Share on Facebook

The Wooly Mammoth Emerges from the Wrong Side of his Icy Tomb

Love means never having to say "you terrify me".

Can you feel it, the thaw? Can you hear it, winter's retreat? Oh yeah, March on, wayward sons and daughters. Captain Heartlock here with your midweek mashup of "things to do" and "places to be" for discriminating hep-cats on the retro-rocker scene.

WEDNESDAY 3/3

Two Williamsburg, Brooklyn based DJ happenings of note:

DJs Popwell and Bunny Punch present their monthly LIVING FOR KICKS party at Satellite Lounge (143 Havemeyer St and South 1st)a full-on smorgasbord of 60's garage, pop, psych and soul. Charlie Kong of Charlie and the Crybabies spins rockabilly, doo wop and other things that the greasers adore over at Rocky's outpost on the northside, Cyn Lounge on Bedford Ave and N.5th. Both these happenings are free at two affordable, dark (in a film noir kinda way) and low key spots that are perfect for taking the edge off your edge.

If it's live you desire, head on over to Don Pedro to catch the "Stoner Pop" stylings of HUMBOLDT FOG. Trippy bass lines and extravagant fuzz solos are waiting to steal your wallets. Should be on after 9pm and is yet another Lady Bree production...Do check out the lush psychedelia of THE HIDDEN RATIO, who kick off a night with fellow heads DEAD STARS and SUBMARINE BELLS at Union Pool, that old den of iniquity. I cannot confirm but I'd expect at least a $7 cover, being Union Pool and all. 30% less douche bag with your purchase on a Wednesday, to boot!

And of course, for the Manhattan side of life there's MR. FINE WINE and his rare delicious soul and r&b 45's at Houston Street's Botanica and JONATHAN TOUBIN and The New York Night Train at the one and only Motor City. Free, Free, Free - unlike your liver transplant...

THURSDAY 3/4

Big to-do over at the tripped out art-party space Secret Project Robot on Kent Avenue and River Street, on the Waterfront of Williamsburg: it's the 1 year anniversary party for Paul Dillon's PERFECT PRESCRIPTION party, promising an array of "Psych, ShoeGaze, Kraut and Space Rock" with psychedelic light show and live performances by fantastic psych-pop vagabonds THE RUNAWAY SUNS and other groups of the more shoegazey variety (FUXA, APOLLO HEIGHTS and SOREN WELL, amongst others). $5 bucks to blow your mind. DJ MOJO 2000 mans the decks into the night. Avast!

More Live: If someone invites you to "take a ride on a short bus", you take them up on it, mother: a louder and sleazier show is to be had at TRASH BAR on Grand St., Williamsburg - THE DEMANDS, GIRL TO GORILLA, THE VONDELLS, THE CRUSHER and THE RUBBER ROOM RATS, in that order from 8pm. Wowy Zowy! $6 cover with their infamous 8-9pm "open bar". The smell of tater-tots compels you!

Finally, if you find yourself in the East Village be sure to hit up Heathers (506 East 13th Street), one of the last cool places in the damn neighborhood, where Mr. Robinson, DosPlatos and BamaLama Mike will spin 50's and 60's pop, soul and doo-wop, fiercely yet lovingly.

Get out on the streets and make your choices known!

Stay Gold, Friends and Fiends...

Oweinama

add to del.icio.us to Digg Share on Facebook