Something Something Crazy

A little bit you, a little bit me, a lot of smoke

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The Unberable Heaviness of The Wild Life

When life gives you lemons, go make margaritas! When life gives you the fleas, start a flea circus and charge admission! When life gives you a spring weekend in the Greater New York Metropolitan Area jam packed with bad ass underground rock and roll happenings and dance parties, you take it by the hand and yell “KISS ME, you FOOL”! Yeah, cause you like it THAT way.

Let’s go:

Friday April 8th

The sure bet for live action tonight is the shindig going down at brand new Lower East Side rock venue (!) The Suffolk (107 Suffolk (between Delancey & Rivington). UNDERGROUND POW presents: A FUCKLOAD OF GREAT ROCK ‘N’ ROLL ALL NIGHT LONG !!!! is the name of the event. Them’s some big words, but they ought to be able to back it up with live performances by Brownbird Rudy Relic, the debut of Charlie Kong’s new group The Thunderfucks and blues stompers The Dead Ex’s! DJs Drew Redmond, Michael Levine and Charles Gaskins spin garage, punk, and greaser pop between bands and into the night, and there’s an open PBR bar from 10-11. All this for a $3 cover. Doors are at 9:30.

Rock’EM Sock’EM, a monthly rock and roll/indie party hosted by Ultra V and DJ Omega at Otto’s Shrunken Head has got a night of feverish punk and glam tonight, as The Afterbirth shares the stage with nude and rude The Ruffian Arms, who proclaim proudly (via their MySpace page) that “We are into dildos and exhibitionism, and we do parties.” Believe it! Doors at 10, bands at 11, no cover!

Ruffian Arms perform Titty Titty Bam Bam @ Fontana’s, NYC

MORE live Punk Rock, on the other side of the East River: The ever greasy Trash Bar has a stacked lineup featuring Hey Stranger: (NYC Ska and Pop/Punk), The Blackout Shoppers, Chesty Malone and the Smash Em Ups (Chesty Breasty Glam), The Lipstick Killers (a New York Dolls tribute band), Tri-State Conspiracy (8 piece psychobilly-swing band) and NJ Ska hustlers The Hub City Stompers. All in that order from 8pm, and of course the open bar from 8-10pm is in effect…$8 cover!

The boogie fuzz heavies Strange Haze (formerly known as Whooping Crane) perform at Don Pedro at midnight! While they are always a delight and will no doubt rock your mind with their mammoth riffage, I have no idea about the bands that precede them (their names are too fucking generic for Google to do me any good)…but Jake Noodles booked it so I’m assuming they’ve got some redeeming qualities! Probably a $5 or $6 cover…

The live soul and sweet r&b spectacle that is The Solid Set performs at this months edition of the NuBlu based party Let’s Boogaloo! DJs Turmix and DJ Ol’Stark spin old school Latin , deep funk and rare grooves between sets and all night! $10 cover, 11 show…

Let the night of 1000 DJ dance parties commence:

Home Sweet Home is where you go to receive a one two punch (TO THE FACE!!!) of Metropolis Vintage’s Happy Hour, commandeered by Drew “Peanut Butter Balls” Redmond from 8pm-11pm and followed by Jonathan Toubin’s Shakin’ All Over Under Sideways Down from 11 on. Jonathan’s joined this week by the master blaster of soul Mr. Finewine, so prepare thyself for frantic ass-shaking. Seriously, go and freak those weird weekend warriors out with your dancing and your smiling and stuff. $3 cover, free before 11 and after 3am, and this week’s secret “beat the line” password is  “Hip Shaker”. Dig.

Linda Rizzo continues to bring uptown denizens the wylde sounds of garage, punk, and early 70′s soul and funk to The Ding Dong Lounge on the Upper West Side, every Friday night from 10pm on and on!

Phast Phreddie and Nogood Nick join forces for ALLIGATOR BOOGALOO! An evening of Modernist Jazz at Teddy’s in Williamsburg! They’ll be throwing down little vinyl platters of Mod Jazz and Organ Groovers all night from 9pm as foxy moll Brooklyn Baby Doll sashays across the dance floor. No cover! Delicious Food! Great Beers! Badder Tunes! What else ya want?

Over at Union Pool, push through the horny masses and head straight for the back room for a Pyschedelic Dance Party! Video projection artist and VJ to the stars BAMiAM.TV and Sheri Barclay (The Barclay Hour on Newtown & Viva Radio) throw down psychedelia, fuzz punk, glam rock, soul grooves and more joy inducing goodness, while trippy visuals flood your eyes and the floor beneath your dancing feet! No cover for this madness!  The ladies are on fire from 11pm till late late late!

Saturday April 9th

Hullabaloo!!!! HULLABALOO!!! Say that name three times and a hand will reach out of the toilet and pinch your bum! It’s not only a children’s curse, it’s a motherlovin’ PARTY! Tonight’s edition, at it’s natural habitat Don Pedro, showcases the savage talents of new Brooklyn all-star surf punk band The Apehangers, the garage punk, farfisa drenched Jersey swagger of The Brimstones, the messy street punks who need a hug and some valium Foster Care, and headlining act, Jackson, Mississippi’s Overnight Lows, who somehow work the “live in the dirty south but sound like The Bowery circa ’78″ sound…They’ve got music on Goner Records, go check that stuff out…$7 cover, 9pm kick off, with your pals Shimmy and Charles Gaskins DJing between bands and till they turn on the bright lights…

It’s the return of The POLYGLOT DISCOTHEQUE! It’s happening at Zebulon in Williamsburg from 10pm and of course features Jonathan Toubin and Josh Styles spinning 60′s yeye, French pop and other rare international beat, garage and mod ’45′s  all night long! The cherry on this sundae is a live performance by the duet of world reknown chanteuse de gentillesse April March and Julien Gasc of of Stereolab and Aquaserge. Jet Set through Sound, sugar! Party starts at 10pm with a $6 cover!

Legendary OG NYC punk band The Testors reunite for a very rare performance at The Delancey, their first (and only?) appearance since they disbanded in 1979. What have they got left in their tanks? Have the maintained their dangerous vigour?  Who killed Laura Palmer? You’ll have to be there to find out…word has it Alix Brown is on hand to DJ this affair. 8pm doors, $10 cover!

Big show in Jersey tonight at Maxwell’s, where The Greenhornes perform for the luckily assembled this fine evening! Fresh off the release of last year’s critically acclaimed 12 inch (with Jim Jarmusch penned liner notes, to boot!), these American Masters of garage and bubblegum pop bring sunshine where it’s sorely needed in this world of ours! Get yer’ tickets here in advance while you can…

For pure garage sounds closer to home, The Beat Rats are performing at the previously mentioned new (well, new to us!) LES venue with the fake beach for a backyard, The Suffolk .  They play at 10 and once again Michael Levine is on DJ duty. No cover!

The new, all girl garage-sters Party Lights (featuring Anna Anabolic and Quitty) returns to the scene of their first crime for only their second show , Park Slope BK’s, Hanks Saloon. They’re on at midnight with no cover at all.

Lastly and by NO MEANS leastly, legendary punk / garage pop band The Dead Milkmen are playing at Warsaw. ‘Nuff Said. Get your tickets at this link now if you wanna go…I’d be surprised if it’s not sold out by the day of…

I think that’s everything worth your time, money and crazy for the weekend – but if I’ve forgotten anything wild and of our style, please let us know here. You can tell us. We’re only human and we need to be loved. Just like everybody else loves.

I hate myself for just having done that.

Whatever. You go have yourself a merry little Christmas.

-Captain Heartlock

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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