"Oh HAI Lisa!"

Holy fuck I am still SO WASTED and I don’t even remember how I got home from The Bell House last night. I am lucky to be alive and surely owe My Sweet Satan a couple of favors. Fuck. FUCK. Where’s my camera? WHERE’S MY MIND?

Those of you who were there, you know.

Here’s whats coming up TONIGHT. Check back TOMORROW for Shimmy’s rundown of Saturday’s affair, and we’ll eventually have photos and video from the last couple of days up. Where’s my camera? FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK

Friday November 11

It’s Nigel Tufnel Day, let’s just get that out of the way. Turn everything up to 11. Which is code for lose your god damn marbles and ruin every tube in your boutique guitar amp. FOREVER.

TONIGHT at  Day 2 (oh, really Night 2) of Norton Fest: Break out the god damn baby powder for your shoes for the SOUL REVUE:

ANDRE WILLIAMS (who really TORE IT UP with hilarity last night with his brief stage appearance and raunchy banter before the 5 6 7 8′s played…. If there’s anyone in Hollywood with half a brain they will make a buddy cop sitcom with him and Kim Fowley and give them absolute free reign)

MELVIN DAVIS

- DAVE “BABY” CORTEZ, backed up by LONNIE YOUNGBLOOD and THE BLOODHOUNDS (whom I had the great honor of singing backup vox on two tracks along with almost all the other rock and roll negros in this silly town on his latest release!)

All that, ALL THESE LEGENDS, a bucket of beer, and then live raw rock and roll by garage overlords Reigning Sound and Japanese surf kings Jackie and the Cedrids. FACT.

Not finished! ALSO: Mark Sultan! Great Gaylord and the Condo Fucks and The Nortones!

If  you don’t have tickets for tonight, get some. Craigslist is your friend and some of your friends are coming down with the flu. All this at The Bell House in Gowanus, Brooklyn. And the G train is nowhere near as bad as all the pussies will have you believe.

Your other Friday hangouts:

Bratty ass garage chicks from Atlanta The Coathangers are playing at The Studio at Webster Hall! They’re playing along with a San Antonio based touring band called Girl in a Coma that is rocking a serious PJ Harvey vibe (and have a new release out Joan Jett’s  Blackheart Records, to boot!) …$12 cover, 7:30 doors….

The absolutely delightful woman CrystalBlu spins psych, soul, go-go and surf rock for the happy hour people getting their nails did at Beauty Bar (The Manhattan branch on 14th Street and 3rd Ave) from 7pm-11pm! No cover

Jonathan Toubin’s ultimate Friday rock and soul hang Shakin’ All Over Under Sideways Down is having an 11/11/11 party tonight, where he’ll be spinning all kinds of rad vinyl with Pete Slovenly (of Slovenly Records) from 11pm – 3am! This week’s password (if you can even imagine!) is “THESE GO TO ELEVEN”. Not for nothing you’ve got Matt Hollywood of The Brian Jonestown Massacre spinning in the fancy cocktail lounge upstairs and Ethan Miller playing international funk for Metropolis Happy Hour from 8pm till Toubin starts…all happening at Chinatown haunt Home Sweet Home!

Lastly, the lovely DJ La La Linda spins wicked sets of garage, psych, punk, funk and soul at uptown Manhattan asylum The Ding Dong Lounge from 10pm till close, with nothing to lose but your mind…

That’s what I got, if we’re missing anything drop it here and we will list it. We’re here to inform the people about the good times, that’s all we wanna do…Check back tomorrow afternoon, where Shimmy will inform you of Saturday happenings, okay? OKAY!

Unga Bunga,                                                                                                                         Captain Heartlock

I Think of Demons...

The days grow shorter, the nights grow weirder! Shiploads of Shit to do this weekend for the rocker in you. As the man of the Horus eyed triangle said, let us Slip Inside this House…

Friday November 12

Obviously the true highlight of the evening and perhaps entire weekend is the massive show at Maxwell’s tonight, where my hero and god, the legendary Roky Erickson, touches down on our side of the cosmos this evening with his new and hot young Austin backing band, Okkervil River, in support of his new album of unreleased songs True Love Cast Out All Evil.  He’s preceded by our very own overlords of the mod freakbeat swing The Above and fellow Austin musicians The Happen-Ins, who play a kind of countrified boogie woogie rock. If you haven’t got your tickets already there should still be some day of the show. Yeah, It’s $30 dollars and you’re eating ramen for breakfast, but it’s a small price to pay: it’s a miracle this man is still with us and with it enough to perform.

From the originator to his descendants:

The mighty, mighty Black Hollies perform their decadent acid paisley punk at Williamsburg Brooklyn’s Bruar Falls, bundled along with the far out, sunshine sweet swagger of The Runaway Suns and Los Angeles based, Eastern tinged hippy pop freaksters The Strangers Family Band. I don’t quite believe it, but this is supposedly a FREE fucking show. What have you done to deserve this?

Another equally great night of contemporary explorers of the psychedelic realm is to be had at Buswhick, Brooklyn’s Don Pedro. Philadelphia’s Sounds of Kaleidoscope, who play lush, loud, dreamy acid anthems that I declare could heal all ailments, headline a bill featuring Minnesota shoegazers Gospel Gossip, dream pop stylings by Invisible Days,  and Los ToughFits,  a primitive sounding, garage punk band of local loons. $6 dollars for all this Lady Bree presentation of creamy madness.

Up the road at Harefield Road (769 Metropolitan Avenue, BK NY) – Contemporary Blue Eyed Soul brothers The Jay Vons perform for you ever-loving heart and in celebration of their smooth 7 inch single “Maybe I Loved You”on Cryptovision Records. They’re supported by The Piggies. No cover!

MORE psychedelia! Heavy Hands, Weird Owl and The Heliotropes are gonna freak. You. Out. At The Charleston!

Union Pool is going to get it’s ass handed to it tonight, especially if it thinks it can handle the onslaught that will come in the form of The Stalkers, All Night Drug Prowling Wolves, The Ex Humans, and Haunted Boots. God Damn. 9pm kick off, cover charge, unknown! Bring dollars!

DJ ACTION:

The terrible twosome of Jonathan Toubin and Josh Styles attack the sensibilities of the polo shirt / jeans and pumps bozos at Shakin’ All Over Sideways Down, down the stairs of China Town haunt Home Sweet Home. Maximum rock and soul guaranteed! Free before 11pm, $3 dollars afterwards with secret word SMASHED!BLOCKED! to get you to the front of the line!

Uptown rocker girl Linda Rizzo regales the peoples with 60′s garage, punk, soul, and other assorted goodness at her weekly DJ night at The Ding Dong Lounge, if you can Ding Dong Dig It.

The Boogaloo Omnibus Phast Phreddie is joined by WFMU’s Gaylord Fields for his latest exploration of fantastic underground sounds for the boogie, PROVOCATIVE POP! The Spectra Sonic Sounds of the Sixties. Expect the gents to spin all kinds of pop goodness from that greatest of times, from wall of sound groovers to girl groups a-go-go to dance craze numbers. Taking place at Williamsburg’s legendary Teddy’s, and with no cover for this sonic elation!

Saturday November 13th

It’s Rockabilly Psychosis at Public Assembly! For your approval, Laura Rebel Angel presents the rollicking, surf tinged Boogie Brains, the wild savagery of Labretta Suede and the Motel 6, Rockabilly slicksters Rhythm Bound and Jittery Jack!

The All Night Drug Prowling Wolves are on the streets again, prowling and on drugs, along with scuzz punks Dirty Spiders at the pizza and beer arcade LuLu’s in Greenpoint….Meanwhile, their co-horts from the previous nights mania, The Ex-Humans, are performing at Death By Audio with The Coathangers. To young to die!

Over at Don Pedro, the fuzzed out, grungy, reverb heavy punk kids Shellshag perform an eagerly awaited set, along with a Bay Area lo-fi garage band who’s into fast playing and vox harmonies Street Eaters, hip shaking Brooklyn garage creatures Big Eyes and the “one two there four” goofy punk rock antics of  Sexy Crimes. Kickin’ you in the ear at 9pm…

This is what I want, this is what I got. Whatever you choose to do, do it for the country. Toodles!

- Captain Heartlock, esq

The Choke begin a cross-country tour on Thursday.
Photo by “ndinneen”.

So, you gonna let a little rain stop you from having fun? Everything’s indoors now, no more pool parties or any of that Summery crap. So get out there! But not on Monday…

Monday

Spend the evening shining your shoes, matching up your socks, polishing your cell phone, or whatever. Just don’t go out, ’cause that will be really boring. We got nuthin’ for Monday.

Tuesday

Bring your cold-weather duds and matching socks to a great Underclass Revue at Bowery Electric. This week The Othermen, GeTSeT, and the The Dirty Shames will rock the place to its foundations (which is roughly where the stage is). DJ Joe Western spins the tunes between sets from the fortress above the stage. No requests or he may pour boiling oil on you.

Hot Dog! lights up Bar Matchless once again. Lots of new records being played now that everyone is back from vacation. 2-for-1 drinks, good bar food, from 8 ’till late, no cover.

Wednesday

Weird Atlanta punks The Coathangers share the stage at Cake Shop with somewhat normal ex-Atlanta punks Ex-Humans and somewhat pronounceable local punks PRSMS. Over in Brooklyn, garage-rockers Two Tears open for Jemina Pearl at Bruar Falls.

As always you can chill out with Mr. Fine Wine as he spins classic soul music at Botanica or fire it up at Motor City Bar as the guest DJs of New York Night Train Wednesdays spin punk, garage, and all things earsplitting. No cover for either.

Thursday

Nouvellas headline a show at Bowery Electric which also features psych-rockers Revival Times. Richard Lloyd (of the band Television) headlines at Maxwell’s. The Choke and Images are in for a surprise at the Slipper Room. Based on the one previous occasion on which I saw a band there, the sound is actually pretty good but the pole in the middle of the stage is annoying. Anyway, this is the first of The Choke’s three shows in New York before they head off to San Diego for six months.

Oh, and there’s the Jay Reatard/NoBunny show at Le Poisson Rouge. Almost forgot about that…

Lots of shows tonight, and lots of DJ night options too. There’s Boogaloo Shampoo, a night of Soul music at Beauty Bar Brooklyn. DJs Mr. Robinson and DosPlatos spin 50s, 60s, and Soul music at Heathers. For something a little more different there is Thursday Thump, an evening of Punk, Glam, Psych rock at Enids. All three are free, so go to as many as you can!

Marcus

Still your #1 source for “thank you reliable hot dog“.